It's been too long, belly button, friend of mine. I've been so preoccupied with the world-at-large that I've neglected you. I apologize. It seems like only yesterday I would stare at you for hours and contemplate Deep Thoughts. Thoughts, I was certain, the whole world was waiting with anticipation for me to share.
I miss those days.
I rarely see you lately, except to note that you are no longer folded under the weight of my widening belly. In my hiatus from gazing upon you, I've taken to getting some activity, losing some poundage. Perhaps, if I keep it up, someday others will gaze upon you lovingly, as I once did. Perhaps. Although belly buttons do seem a bit passé.
It's a fashion thing, huh? I haven't seen Britney or Beyoncé sporting a midrift-baring, half-top in ages. Maybe that's not due to changing tastes, though. Maybe they've just moved on. Beyoncé is working her classy Hollywood, gold-lamé, French singing, Mrs. Z mogul-action and Brit's been busy parading around the trailerpark with that Blue-Light-Special, Timberlake knock-off, common-law boy-ho of hers. They're no longer engaged in navel research. They've found other things in the world to concentrate their energies on.
Maybe it's my age. I'm well into my 30s now, certainly in 30 years I've learned everything there is to know about you, belly-button. You're pretty much established at this point, got your shape, your size, your general lint-y-ness, your position laterally and longitudinally. You're not bringing much more to this relationship. You can be like a distant cousin to me, or an old college friend, someone I don't have to call everyday, someone I can check-in with occasionally, a little howyadoin', a little letchaknowIwasthinkinaboutcha.
But I can't stare at you everyday. I can't find another interesting thing about you to share with the world. I've got to find important, facinating things to chat about. I need to take off the blinders and open up my peripheral vision.
Do you think I could set up some mirrors to get a decent view of my ear canal?
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